Decide. And then don’t decide.
I want to share a simple piece of advice that can eliminate so much wasted time from your life. Decide…and then don’t decide.
What I am encouraging you to do is to make a bunch of decisions all at once so that they are MADE. And then the only thing you have to do is the easiest thing of all—don’t go back and re-make them.
While I do think this can be applied to big decisions, I’m mostly talking about the smaller decisions today. The ones that take up a disproportionate amount of space in your brain. The decisions you make again and again.
Decisions like:
My friend had a baby! What gift should I send?
I’m invited to a party! What should I bring?
I want to buy a new shirt! What color should it be?
I want to make dinner! What should I cook?
I want to use small amounts of free time more efficiently! What should I do on my phone?
I want to celebrate an achievement! What should I do?
How to do this:
For a week or two, note down every decision you’re making for the second, third, fourth, or fiftieth time. Just make a note of it.
Now, sit down with your list and set a timer (I’d say ten minutes but you might want more) and make each decision. It doesn’t have to be perfect—you can always change your mind later!—but it has to be made.
Now all you have to do is….not decide. From now on, when those question pop into your mind, you know exactly what to do. Read on for some suggestions from my own life:
1) My friend had a baby! What gift should I send?
I have a list of seven baby/kids books that I love. Every time I need to buy a baby gift, I put in the same order at the same indie bookstore and have them mail the books. Always a hit.
2) I want to buy a new shirt! What color should it be?
On some episode of Gretchen Rubin’s Happier podcast that I can’t remember, a listener mentioned that each year she chooses a theme color and that’s what she buys. So if this year’s color is red, she always picks the red shirt, the red bag, the red phone case, etc.
4) I want to make dinner! What should I cook?
It’s Taco Tuesday! It’s Farro Friday! It’s Waffle Wednesday! It’s Smorgasbord Sunday!
You get what I’m saying. Pick a dish (or at least a theme) and repeat until you get sick of it.
5) I want to use free pockets of time more efficiently! What should I do on my phone?
Standing in line at the drugstore, sitting in the doctor’s waiting room, riding the subway, waiting for a friend at a cafe….life is full of opportunities to mindlessly scroll. This is one I haven’t put into practice yet, but I’m going to start using these bits and pieces of free time to delete photos from my phone. When I’ve finished that, I’ll read those articles I’ve saved in Pocket. By the time I’ve read all those I should be back to a bloated Photos app, so I can just keep alternating.
6) I want to celebrate an achievement! What should I do?
This is one I need help with. I am trying to get better about celebrating even small achievements, but one simply CANNOT constantly be opening bottles of Champagne since one is not a millionaire and also I have all these Negronis to drink.
Opening this one up to you, reader: what do you do to celebrate?